when the only person you truly love is in the process of leaving? whether its breaking up with you, moving, or both. what can you do to keep your head up high without showing anyone youre dying inside. what can you do to keep your mind occupied without thinking about the pain youre feeling? it sucks when the person that hurts you is the person you want to go to make you feel better. its like after you lost them, you lost everything...
not gonna lie, feeling pretty fuckin low right now. so vulnerable, i'm almost willing to do anything to get me up again...maybe i'll fuck up from time to time, but i'll never lose who i am cus God made me better than that. good luck to me.
So its times like this when we're not texting...I text you first cus I miss you and I want to talk. But then you give me short, vague responses as if you don't want to talk. I ask if you're alright, then you get mad at me for asking, saying I'm annoying. So I stop texting you. Then you get even more mad at me for not texting you. Well what do I say when you say I'm annoying? What can I say to "k" or "okay" or "idk"? Its like when I start conversations with you, you can never keep them going. I don't know, maybe I'm thinking too much or what not...but I can never understand why you would make it so difficult to talk to you. I want to, and I would all day and all night...but damn, you gotta show you want to talk too.
known this shit for a while now, but i guess it never really hit me that it could possibly be true. i couldve avoided all this bullshit and games and tears and pain if i just followed my gut feeling. never again am i second guessing myself, i know when i'm right. fuck it. this is what life's about...going through shit so you'll learn from your mistakes. done.
reminds me of my nephew =) he's gonna be superrr cute when he's older. LOL
